all good things - vaguely

i seriously hope that this is not history repeating itself.
i need you here, ...and you too.
don't let this go to shambles.

seriously? seriously.

Lord it was You,
You created the heavens.
And Lord, it was Your hands
That put the stars in their place.
Lord, it was Your voice
That commands the morning.
'Cause even oceans and their waves bow at your feet, O Lord.

Lord, who am I
Compared to Your glory?
Lord, who am I
Compared to Your majesty?

'Cause I'm your beloved,
Your creation,
And You love me as I am.
You've called me, chosen
For Your kingdom.
Unashamed to call me your own-
I'm your beloved.

-your beloved; vineyard
appease your ears

writer's block

trying to convince people whom you've never met that you are worth their time, energy, and resources is a hard thing. this task of having to write letters of intent and personal statements has been met with much resistance, hesitation, and procrastination (i.e. right now!)

having been brought up in a chinese (albeit whitewashed) family has taught me to be humble, to never flaunt your successes and achievements, yet to use my skills to build and encourage those around me up. being a follower of Christ has encouraged and forced me to take this humility to a whole new level, with Him being the perfect example.

maybe this is why i hate talking about myself, why i find it so hard to share. ah but i am getting off topic.

so with 5000 characters i, along with hundreds/thousands of other applicants, are supposed to reveal why we are one above the rest, why we are deserving of the 60 spots in the program when over 800 will apply.

philippians 2 provides us with guidelines in imitating Christ's humility; guidelines that are seemingly totally contradictory to what we are supposed to do with these letters:
Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.

haaaaaa!
hmmm! much wisdom is needed!
i hope i can best do this to exemplify what God has blessed me with - my upbringing, my experiences, my passions, interests, and skills. i want to know more about this humility thing.. this considering others better than myself.. yet at the same time how does one get through this world that we're called to be a part of? this dog-fight-dog, best man wins, survival of the fittest attitude?

anyway. how refreshing to know and trust that these things are,in the end, not under my control.

i know that if this route of being an occupational therapist is for me, then it shall. i don't believe my human shortcomings in writing, or in academics, is enough to screw up the plans of Him who with a few words spoke the universe to be :)

ps. i miss home!

wise

watch over your heart with all diligence,
for from it flows the springs of life

pr4-23

summer 2008;

{edit draft . . .}